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  • admin 1:48 am on March 13, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Dating your best friend's sister   

    Dating Your Best Friend’s Sister 

    English football captain John Terry discovered he’d broken an unwritten rule when he dated a team mate’s ex girlfriend. But what about the rules around dating your best friend’s sister?

    Is it a total mateship ‘No No’ – indicated in this amusing Hahns Super Dry Beer ad where a man refuses to date his good friend’s sister for fear of violating the Bro code? Would a guy really reject the advances of a pretty girl because she was his friend’s sister?

    See the video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dahXsW5g93M Hahns Super Dry beer,

    And are the conventions forbidding dating a best friend’s sister as strong as those around a mate’s ex? It’s a touchy subject.

    Rules For Damage Control

    Most important is to work out how much damage it might cause to your friendship if it doesn’t work out.  How strongly protective does your friend feel towards his sister, and how far will he take the “Don’t mess with her” stance?

    Dating expert Renee Piane has laid down some guidelines for dating a best friend’s sister to at least ensure you have damage control in place if things don’t work out:

    • Is she old enough to make her own decisions about dating – at least 18 or older?
    • Is she cool about her brother knowing you are dating? If she wants to keep it a secret that’s a clue he’ll be upset and you need to be up front with him before you start anything.
    • Is she someone that you will see often if it doesn’t work out? Running into her at every party for the rest of your life (if you know she is not a keeper) can be a pain!
    • Be honest about your intentions. If you are a player who just wants to hit and run find someone else… it’s not worth the risk of losing a good friend.

    Tell Us What You Think

    So what do you think the rules around dating your best friend’s sister should be? Have you dated a friend’s brother or sister and how did it work out? Do you regret anything about your choices? We’d love to hear  your thoughts.

     

  • admin 1:41 am on March 12, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: better lovers, Clint Eastwood, , late love, older men, Shane Watson   

    Late Love Better Love 

    At 79, five-time Oscar winner Clint Eastwood is an exemplar for the “older men are better men” school of love. Like that another late bloomer Michael Douglas, he’s developed an appreciation for family life as he’s grown older.

    Sure he’s had six children by four different women – he most recently became a father, to 12-year-old daughter Morgan, at the age of 66 – but he’s told the American edition of GQ magazine: “I’m a loyal citizen to the family. And that wasn’t necessarily a given thing.

    “That was acquired. I think when you’re younger, you’re driven by a lot of hormonal effects. It’s like Everest, ‘Because it’s there.’ There’s a lot of people who learn a lot faster than me, that’s for sure.”

    Advantages of Love After 40

    Meeting men who fit the “Simple S Test – Single, Straight and Solvent” when you’re in your 30s and 40s – may not be as straightforward as when you were in college.

    But finding The One later in life has more ups than downs, according to British journalist Shane Watson, (yes she is a femme) who married for the first time at 43 after years of militant singlehood.*

    On the down side there’s the baggage of two lifetimes to be accommodated.  But the numerous advantages of Late Love more than make up for that, she says….

    And that’s because men – and women as well – get better with age, she argues.

    Why Older Men Are Better Men

    “They’ve come through their ruthless selfish years, their hard-partying years and their career-establishing years. They’ve had the midlife crisis if they are going to have it. They are kinder, calmer, more confident.

    Inevitably “they are better practised at sex and basic food shopping, and they don’t have so much to prove. They don’t feel threatened by your independence and their friends have been edited down to those who really count.”

    If they want to go into politics or move to the country, if they are going to have a mid life crisis, they’ve “shown their hand” she suggests, and there are no nasty surprises.

    Mature men also are ready to accept older women as they are, Watson also argues. They’re confident enough not to be intimidated by a successful, high-earning woman.

    Enhancing Late Love

    If you’re happily bedded down in a later life love affair but you’re finding your body is not responding in the same way as it did in your 20s, there are safe natural answers at hand. Herbal supplements like Herbal Ignite can give both men and women a boost to equip them to enjoy love making more whole heartedly. Check it out and see if it suits you.

    • How To Meet A Man After Forty And Other Midlife Dilemmas Solved by Shane Watson, published by Penguin.
     

  • admin 1:13 am on March 11, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , Barney Stinson, Bro Code, dating a friend's ex, How I Met Your Mother, John Terry, Neil Patrick Harris, Samantha Brett, unwritten rule of dating, Wayne Bridges   

    My Best Friend’s Ex 

    How unforgivable is it to date a mate’s ex-girlfriend? If he didn’t know it before, John Terry the former England football captain, is finding out he’s broken one of the unwritten rules of friendship – never date a friend’s ex.

    First he lost the captaincy, became the target of a nationwide smear campaign, and now team mate Wayne Bridges has spat the dummy and refused to play with him.

    He’s ignored one of the biggest rules of the brotherhood – never date a good friend’s ex girlfriend, not matter how alluring and available.

    “If the ex-girlfriend rule is ever broken, chances are that the friendship will be lost, and a physical fight might even break out,” advises Ask Men’s relationship counsellor Curt Smith.

    The Bro Code

    Sydney newspaper dating advice columnist Samantha Brett points out anyone in desperate need for guidance can always look to the official Bro Code book, authored by (the fictional) Barney Stinson, the serial womaniser (played by Neil Patrick Harris) in the hit TV show How I Met Your Mother.

    Stinson – who rotates his women as often as he changes his underwear – lives his life by his self-created Bro Code and continually quotes it to his mates when he feels they’re doing wrong by him.

    The rules of his code include:

    * Bros before Hos.

    * The mom of a Bro is always off-limits but the stepmom of a Bro is fair game if she initiates it and/or is wearing at least one article of leopard print clothing.

    * A Bro will drop whatever he’s doing and rush to help his Bro dump a chick.

    * If a Bro forgets a guy’s name he may call him “brah”, “dude”, or “man” but never “Bro”.

    Are the ‘Rules’ Right?

    So she’s delectable – and she’s available. Your mate has moved on and says he’s not interested any more.  Is it EVER okay to ask her out? If so, how long after your mate has broken up with her would it be acceptable to make a move?

    Are there any other unwritten “Bro Code” rules you follow or expect your friends to follow. Have you experienced a friendship gone sour because a mate broke the rules – or quite the opposite – you took up with a mate’s “ex” and now you’re all great buddies.

    We’d be fascinated to hear of your experiences in this fraught arena.

     

  • admin 12:00 am on March 10, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Anastacia, beauty secrets, Chaka Khan, looking good at any age, Lulu, , Maurice Gibb, To Sir with Love   

    At 61 – More Fab Than Ever 

    She looks more fabulous at 61 than she did at 21, and she knows it. Famous at 15 for her hit single “Shout” and a few years later for her international smash “To Sir with Love”, Lulu has managed to reinvent her look and her career more often and more successfully than any other 60s singer.

    She’s just completed another new project, a short tour with singers Chaka Khan and Anastacia, called Here Come the Girls, she has a book – Lulu’s Secrets To Looking Good – out in March and she flogs Time Bomb, a line of anti-ageing skin care products on British shopping channel QVC.

    She’s coy about face lifts and quotes Madonna on the topic; “I am not against cosmetic surgery; I am against talking about it.”

    Live and Let Live

    She admits to having “done the Botox thing – been there, done that, got the T-shirt. I am not into doing that any more. But who am I to say to anyone else, “Don’t do this, don’t do that”? Live and let live, I say. Being judgmental is very ageing.’

    And she wouldn’t want to turn the clock back. “Women can now look and feel good for a lifetime,” she said in an interview with the UK newspaper the Daily Mail to launch her book.

    “We are living longer, we are living more healthily, science is more advanced; and as a result my generation has the chance to be ageless.

    “It would never have occurred to my mother that she could write a book or start a business at 60; now women can do whatever they like, be whoever they want,’ she says with a smile (a smile, she points out in one of her tips in her book, is an ‘instant face-lift’).

    Happily Single

    Twice married – first to Bee Gee Maurice Gibb, she had a son Jordan in her second marriage to John Frieda but now says living alone – in Maida Vale with her West Highland terrier Clyde – suits her.

    She doesn’t rule out the idea of meeting but looking for love is not high on her agenda and she doesn’t envisage marrying again.

    ‘If I did meet someone it wouldn’t be the same as I thought a relationship should be in the past. Women used to think that their partner should be everything to them – father, mother, brother, sister, lover, friend – and I don’t think that’s the case any more.’

    And Grandmother Too

    Her son Jordan has had a baby daughter Isabella Rose and grandmotherhood (the family now call her Nana Lu) fits nicely with all the other roles in Lulu’s life.

    She is constantly challenging herself (‘I like to shake things up’) she is currently taking a creative writing course, and last year she studied social science at university level.

    But music remains her primary passion. Unlike many of her male contemporaries she is not caught in a ‘Boom Bang-a-Bang’ (her 1969 joint-Eurovision-winning song) time warp. Her iPod is a veritable showcase of young talent – she loves Rihanna (‘Oh my God, she is amazing!’) – and during the Here Come the Girls tour she was happier singing ‘Lady Marmalade’ than her own 1960s standards.

    Looking Good ‘At Any Age’

    The premise of Lulu’s book is to help other women to look as good as she does ‘at any age’.

    Asked if she could pick out the five most important tips from the book she is, for a moment, lost for words.

    ‘Well, that’s difficult. I think less is more is a good rule as you grow older, particularly when it comes to make-up. And a good haircut is key, as is learning to play up your good points.

    Above all, if you are open to new things, then life is a wonderful adventure. It’s about enjoying yourself, not torturing yourself; not making it a chore.

     

  • admin 10:00 pm on March 8, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: bored, Boredom, dangerous to health, , heart risk, raise blood pressure   

    Bored To Death 

    My Grandma used to say boring people are bored people – but sometimes a touch of the old ennui is unavoidable.

    Waiting for web pages to load, getting stuck in traffic, watching someone play video games – they come high on most people’s Top Five Most Boring Things to do list.

    They’re all things that test your patience, but they’re not terminal you say.  Until now, that is, because according to new research, you really can be bored to death.

    Boredom Bad For Heart

    It seems the more bored you are, the more likely you are to die early, although scientists caution it’s probably not the boredom alone that will kill you, but the risky behaviour – drinking, eating, inhaling the wrong things – that often accompanies it.

    It doesn’t hurt to be just occasionally bored – that happens to everyone. It’s the chronic kind of boredom that’s dangerous.

    In the study 7500 London civil servants aged 35 – 55 were questioned about how bored they were at work the previous month, and then those who were still alive were followed up 20 years later.

    University College London researchers Annie Britton and Martin Shipley found that those who reported they had been very bored were two and a half times more likely to die of a heart problem than those who hadn’t reported being bored.

    But when the authors made a statistical adjustment for other potential risk factors, like physical activity levels and employment grade, the effect was reduced.

    Boredom As Dangerous As Stress

    Researchers point out someone who is bored may not be motivated to eat well or exercise, and boredom is often linked to depression, which has long been recognized as a risk factor for heart disease.

    Others said boredom was potentially as dangerous as stress.

    “Boredom is not innocuous,” said Sandi Mann, a senior lecturer in occupational psychology at the University of Central Lancashire who studies boredom.

    She said boredom is linked to anger suppression, which can raise blood pressure and suppress the body’s natural immunity. “People who are bored also tend to eat and drink more, and they’re probably not eating carrots and celery sticks,” she said.

     

  • admin 9:32 pm on March 7, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: five years younger, formula for successful marriage, Joanne Woodward, Paul Newman   

    Formula for Perfect Marriage 

    Finally, the secret of Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward’s 50-year marriage can be revealed: they got the numbers right.

    Newman was five years older than Woodward, a differential which gets a big tick from researchers at the Geneva School of Business who have come up with a formula for the perfect union.

    After analysing 1074 couples aged 19 to 75, the researchers concluded that the wife should be five years younger than her husband. The partners should be from the same cultural background and the woman should be more intelligent than her spouse.

    Wife Better Educated Gets Tick

    How much more intelligent? The wife should be at least 27 per cent brighter than her husband and should hold a degree, while he should not. Perhaps unsurprisingly, marrying a divorcee reduced the chance of wedded bliss.

    ”If people follow these guidelines in choosing their partners they can increase their chances of a happy, long marriage by up to 20 per cent,” said Nguyen Vi Cao, whose study was reported in the Sydney Morning Herald and is published in the European Journal of Operational Research.

    Five Year Differential

    Paul Newman was a divorcee (no tick there) and it would be rude to speculate if his wife was smarter than him. But the magic five-year differential can also be observed in the long-lasting marriages of the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh and Australian Prime Minister John and Janette Howard.

     

  • admin 4:30 am on March 6, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Ballina, Bass Coast, , Bribie Island, Copper Coast, Echuca, Geraldton, Inverloch, Kadina, Mandurah, Moonta, Murray River, New South Wales, Perth, Phillip Island, Port Macquarie, Queensland, South Australia, St Helens, Tamar Valley, Tasmania, Toowoomba, Torquay, Tweed Valley, Victor Harbor, , Wallaroo, Western Australia, Wonthaggi   

    Best Places To Retire in Australia 

    You’re thinking of escaping from the big city for a more peaceful, less polluted life in a country town or beachside community. You want to avoid the known – and unknown hazards – like man-eating koalas and deranged gunmen. So before you sell up and move, it’s a great idea to do investigate your options. And there’s no better guide on how to avoid disaster than Jill and Owens Weeks’s well-researched retirement advice.

    For more than a decade, they’ve investigated Australia from north to south, east to west, for their best-selling publications.

    Here’s their pick of the best places to retire.

    New South Wales

    The state with “by far the greatest number of ideal retirement locations.  North of Sydney, the entire coastline all the way up to Newcastle is popular, particularly as retirement trends change in favour of semi retirement.”

    Port Macquarie – “vibrant and dynamic area which offers many of the services and culture of a large city.”

    Ballina “good for those who want to get away from capital cities and can live without many of the facilities they offer.”

    Tweed Valley “offers most of the good features of the Gold Coast without many of the downsides . .  and close to Coolangatta international airport just across the border in Queensland.”

    Victoria

    Torquay (near Geelong) “There’s a buzz about the place . . . close to Geelong’s facilities. Fastest growing non-metropolitan area in Victoria and a clear favourite with retirees.”

    Bass Coast (Inverloch, Wonthaggi, Phillip Island) or Echuca (on the Murray River) “Cost of housing reasonable and a compelling list of positive features with few if any down sides.”

    Western Australia

    Mandurah (south of Perth)  - “Special appeal because of the number of services focused on retirees,” or Geraldton.

    Queensland

    Toowoomba “affordable housing, good facilities, relaxed pace, and not over-crowded with tourists in holidays. Not as humid as the coast, and Brisbane is accessible.”

    Bribie Island “preferred destination for those who want to get away from the congestion of the Gold coast.”

    South Australia

    Victor Harbor “Outstanding geography, access to Adelaide, vineyards and fine food. Holiday destination for over 100 years, town is full of well-preserved buildings, museums,” or the Copper Coast Yorke Peninsula  (Kadina, Wallaroo, Moonta.)

    Tasmania

    St Helens “Ideal climate on the Sun Coast, an affordable and relaxed lifestyle that few places in Australia can match,” or the Tamar Valley

    Checklist for Retiring

    Jill and Owen Weeks suggest:

    • Consider renting in the location of your choice. House-sit or even caravan-sit before you buy.
    • Subscribe to the local newspaper for at least 12 months before you move. This provides a good source of jobs, real estate and what’s happening in the community.
    • Research the utilities and services. Does the mobile phone work? Is there internet connection and educational services? This is particularly important if you are running a home-based business. Also check local services such as the nearest mechanic or electrician.
    • Will your new home require major renovations? Is it ‘older body friendly?’ Will you eventually need to move because of stairs? What happens if your mobility is impaired?

    See also Where to Retire in Australia for additional advice.

     

  • midlifelove 11:02 pm on March 4, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: 70th birthday, All-Starr summer tour, Barbara Bach, George Harrison, John Lennon, Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr, Ringo turns 70, The Beatles, vegetarian, YNot 15th album   

    Ringo: Great Form Facing 70 

    With a new album, an enduring and happy marriage, and a zest for life that’s the envy of many 30-year-olds, Ringo Starr enters his 70th year with high spirits.

    He’s the eldest of the famous Beatles – he will hit his 70-year milestone on July 7  - and he’s got the newest music.

    He’s not missing a beat as he embarks on a three-week promotional tour for his just-released Y Not album, his 15th solo outing on which fellow Beatle Paul McCartney plays bass on the song ‘Peace Dream’.

    And he plans to mark his 70th by flashing a two-fingered peace sign at noon and playing an evening gig at Radio City Music Hall as part of a summer tour with his latest All-Starr band.

    Last year on the Larry King Show, Starr noted: “I work out. I have a trainer. And I watch what I eat. That’s it really. And I’m in love with a beautiful girl, so it keeps me young.”

    Turning 40 was Harder

    And as he told Randy Lewis of the Los Angeles Times, 70 is “not as big as 40 was. Forty was: ’Oh, God, 40!

    “There’s that damn song, ‘Life Begins at 40.’ No, it’s not so big anymore. I am nearly 70, and I’d love to be nearly 40, but that’s never going to happen.

    “I feel the older I get, the more I’m learning to handle life,”

    Notes Lewis: “His charming Liverpudlian accent is nearly as strong as ever, even though he’s maintained a home in Los Angeles for the last 34 years — the majority of it with actress Barbara Bach, whom he married in 1981 — along with residences in England and Monte Carlo.”

    God Now ‘My Life’

    He’s trim – like McCartney and his late pal Harrison, he’s an avowed vegetarian – looks 15 years younger than his age, and as the years roll by spiritual issues have become more prominent, he says.

    “Being on this quest for a long time, it’s all about finding yourself,” Starr says. “For me, God is in my life. I don’t hide from that. … I think the search has been on since the ’60s. … I stepped off the path there for many years and found my way (back) onto it, thank God.”

    There’s no secret to his successful marriage to Barbara, Starr told USA Today.  ”I’m just blessed that she puts up with me. I love the woman. She loves me. There’s less down days than up, and we get on really well. We do spend a lot of time together. That’s the deal.”

    Many Artistic Projects

    Starr says he also needs diverse creative outlets to keep him engaged when he’s not making albums or touring with his All-Starr band. In the 1970s it was acting, now it’s art — a selection of his photos appears inside the album.

    “I am always painting,” he says. “I love photography. It’s easy to take shots. But if you have to choose, it’s music. I love music, I love playing.”

    Ringo was three months older than John Lennon, who would have turned 70 this year. Lennon was 40 when he was shot dead in New York City.

    Paul McCartney will be 68 this year. George Harrison would have been 67.

     

  • midlifelove 10:22 pm on March 2, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , Father of the year, Gordon Ramsay, Gordongate, infidelity, married man, mistresses, , other woman, Sarah Symonds,   

    Gordon Ramsay’s ‘Ex’: Tips for the ‘Other Woman’ 

    Is it a case of “Mistresses of the World, Unite?”

    Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay’s newly reformed ex-lover Sarah Symonds has written what she describes as a “taboo-busting book “– and she’s passed it on to Tiger Wood’s mistresses in the hope they’ll “learn something from her mistakes.”

    A bit late for them perhaps, but self-proclaimed “infidelity expert” Sarah is undeterred. She’s also gone on Oprah peddling a non-profit organisation “Mistresses Anonymous” (which includes a 12-step program to recovery).

    Why She Went Public

    Sydney Morning Herald sex and relationships blogger Ask Sam was wondering in print what it was with the abundance of mistresses going public on their affairs, so she asked Sarah why she’d decided to spill the beans on her seven-year-affair with the F-word maestro.

    As the British tabloids were quick to point out, Sarah is the debonair bleached-blonde babe who shouted from atop the pages of every British celebrity tabloid about her affair with Father of the Year Ramsay.

    As Ask Sam notes, “we also quickly learnt that this wasn’t the first time she bonked a married man, with the media dubbing her as “making a career out of sleeping with other people’s husbands”

    Other Woman “Can’t Win”

    “Outing” Ramsay, – she calls it “Gordongate” – had nothing to do with wanting to see her name in lights, she told Ask Sam.

    “I went on record to tell my true story after I heard that Gordon was so hurtfully denying it and me, and lying about our affair,” she told Sam.

    In hindsight (and after much trial and error) Symonds now realises high profile public men like Ramsay and Woods are never going to leave their wives for their mistresses.

    “A married man will 99.9% never leave his wife, and uses a mistress as his crutch to stay in an unhappy marriage,” she says.

    From her recent realisation, she feels her job now is to warn all women against dating a married man and being used in another person’s relationship. So here it is, Sarah’s golden rule for singles.

    Top Five Tips For “Other Women”

    1. Never date a married man! Why be second best?
    2. Do your due diligence when you meet a guy to find out if he is married or not. Some men slip their wedding rings off.
    3. Empower yourself enough to not settle for the crumbs of a married man’s time. Find a SINGLE man.
    4. Wives, act more like mistresses to stop your husbands from cheating on you!
    5. Never believe a word any man tells you. Basically, “if his lips are moving he is lying”.

    Ask Sam (Samantha Brett’s) new book The Chase; Everything you need to know about Men, Dating and Sex is available from February 1 at Booktopia.

     

  • midlifelove 4:24 am on March 1, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Baby boomers, , Bette Davis, Jill and Owen Weeks, London Marathon, retire, Richard Branson   

    Where To Retire In Australia 

    You might sympathise with Hollywood star Bette Davis when she said “I will not retire while I’ve still got my legs and my make-up box.”

    Many Baby Boomers see age as “just a number” and like Virgin boss Richard Branson (64) – who’s added training for the 2010 London Marathon to his punishing work schedule  - they’re busy packing more life into their years.

    But even for those to whom “retirement” is a foreign concept, changing lifestyle, moving home, or splitting their year between two places, can be tempting as a mid-life option.

    Looking For A Change

    The children are independent, you don’t need to worry about climbing the corporate ladder any more, and you can take time out to think about what you want to do with the rest of your life.

    If you‘re living in Australia or thinking of moving there, Jill and Owen Weeks have done a heap of research to help with your decisions.

    Their book Where to Retire in Australia is a great resource for anyone in “the Moving Generation” looking for a change of lifestyle.

    • The Weeks’ golden rule is: the most successful moves are usually  less than 200km or no more than two hours from the old location. Why? So people remain in easy reach of old friends, family and social networks.

    Key Issues To Consider

    They’ve identified the key issues to decide on when making a change:

    • Taking care of yourself; Consider closeness to doctors, hospitals and specialist medicine if required; social life – how easy is for family and friends to visit, will you find  your others who share your interests, do you want to spend part of your year in another location?
    • Weather; Check out the climate before you buy. If you’ve only holidayed at the location at certain times of the year rent for 18 months before making a permanent move while you decide if the climate is for you.
    • Keeping the Body Moving; Ensure you can pursue your interest, hobbies and sporting activities.
    • Keeping the Brain Active; Access to the Internet, opportunities for further study, or part time work, libraries.
    • Let’s Go Shopping; Proximity to a reasonably large shopping centre will have impact on your cost of living. Can you use “Loyalty “programmes like FlyBuys and discount cards.
    • Can You Afford to Move; Consider real estate, tax and social security implications, any cost of living changes.
    • Social Compatibility; Moving away from close friends and family may be painful. They may not visit regularly even if they promise they will. Are you good at making new friends and does the place you are moving to welcome new residents.

    Part 2: The Best Places in Australia to Retire.

     

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